


Anywhere, I would've followed you

by EdeatheDemonFox



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Angst, At least there's some cute Xion in here, But my headcanon is that he actually does so there, Canon Compliant, Guilty Riku, Has some ties to Dream Drop Distance, Lea and Isa are mentioned briefly, M/M, Mainly taking place in Destiny Islands, Not A Happy Ending, Painfully hopeful Kairi, Post-Canon, Riku and Xion interacting, Scene in Land of Dragons, Sora's not coming back, kh3
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-29
Updated: 2019-04-29
Packaged: 2020-02-09 23:27:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,212
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18648283
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EdeatheDemonFox/pseuds/EdeatheDemonFox
Summary: His heart ached, but his body felt numb. Everything was heavy, taking a huge effort to even do something as small as blinking.Riku smiled bitterly.“Why did you have to pick somewhere to go that I couldn’t follow?”He closed his eyes and for once the darkness that followed wasn’t just inviting, it was soothing. Numbing him even further. He didn’t want to feel anymore. He just wanted to sleep the pain away forever. So he curled in on himself, hugging his arms to his bleeding chest, a gaping hole wanting nothing more than to be filled – Sora, Sora, SORA – and finally, he felt his knees give out underneath him, collapsing.





	Anywhere, I would've followed you

**Author's Note:**

> Wow, I'm finally back with a fic! XD It's been awhile, but I am severely Kingdom Hearts obsessed and SoRiku obsessed as well, and KH3's ending has only served to fuel my angst apparently so...here's the end result!
> 
> I know this is angsty, but I do have some fluffy SoRiku ideas so if you like this, you'll hopefully love those.
> 
> Also, I have not actually gotten to The Land of Dragons in KH2 (as Mulan would say, "I'm working on it1" XD) so hopefully that scene's okay. It's the one I'm most unsure of but I do like the dialogue and think I wrote Mushu pretty well soooo...yeah.
> 
> Two other things, and then I'm done rambling, promise! First off, hopefully the spacing is okay! That's always something I struggle with, and sometimes longer paragraphs look/feel better, and other times they seem too congested if I don't keep them short.
> 
> Secondly, the ending is meant to be somewhat ambiguous. Literally the last line. I don't want to spoil it but hopefully you guys see what I mean when you get there.
> 
> (On a side note: I also made a small reference to another game somewhere in the fic. If you can tell which line it is and what game it's from, you are amazing!)
> 
> Hopefully guys enjoy this and drop a review if you'd like!~
> 
> Sincerely,  
> EdeatheDemonFox

Say something, I'm giving up on you  
I'm sorry that I couldn't get to you  
Anywhere, I would've followed you  
Say something, I'm giving up on you

And I will swallow my pride  
You're the one that I love  
And I'm saying goodbye  
…  
Riku had always been able to feel Sora, all the way down to the deepest parts of his heart where even darkness shouldn’t have been able to reach. He’d felt Sora in his heart ever since they were kids. Even when Riku had cast aside his friends, his precious person – Sora, himself – and their home…even then, Sora had been there. Like a beacon of light surrounding him and refusing to let go.

__

So then it would stand to reason that if Sora were truly gone, gone for good – and those were dark thoughts Riku didn’t want – then Riku would feel an emptiness inside his chest. A gaping hole, wide and aching, like he was missing something incredibly vital to his survival. 

Soft footsteps strode toward him on the sand.

“Riku?”

“Hmm?”

Riku turned, finding Xion standing there, black hair tucked back behind one ear, melancholy smile bright and fading like the setting sun.  
“Any luck?” the small girl prompted.

Riku shook his head dully, hand coming to rest over his heart with splayed fingers.

“I wish…” he murmured. “I haven’t found him in any of the worlds I’ve checked so far.”

And then Xion put a voice to Riku’s thoughts; a resonating echo.

“I keep thinking that if Sora were really gone, I would feel something in me shatter. We all would, I think.”

“Yeah.”

“You feel him, too, don’t you?”

Xion had always been frighteningly perceptive. If Riku’s heart weren’t in such a state of agony from missing the boy whose light always counteracted his darkness, Riku would have felt more than fleeting pride at how far the once Replica had come.

Riku finally nodded, not trusting himself to speak again. Xion smiled in return, turning toward Destiny Island’s sun.

“Then he’s still out there somewhere. And we’ll find him.”

The girl nodded firmly, her posture set and determined, like she truly believed without a single doubt in her newborn heart that they would find Sora. 

Doubt, huh? Those were things Riku still had a lot of. Darkness still lived inside him and had to be kept at bay, more than anyone else probably realized, and now with Sora gone, that very same darkness was in a frenzy, numerous doubts eating away at Riku and leaving him with a struggle even more fierce than the very first time he and darkness had gone head to head. He wished he had Xion’s uplifting positivity, her optimism that things would turn out alright. He’d say she was naïve for that, that it was because her heart was still only newly formed, but she had been through her fair share of struggles in her previous life, enough so that she knew how cruel the worlds – or fate – could really be.

“What’s a world we haven’t tried yet?”

Xion’s voice cut through the aching silence, bringing Riku back to reality with a jolt. He turned to find her kneeling in the sand, sifting through the grains for none other than seashells. 

A faint smile came to Riku’s lips.

“Well, there are a lot of worlds out there, some we haven’t even been to yet.”

“Yeah, and knowing Sora’s love of adventure, he could be in any of them, familiar to him or not.”

The pair shared a fond chuckle, but then sobered quickly. 

They had already checked the obvious ones like Twilight Town and Traverse Town; maybe his heart was trapped in a dark, stifling world like The World That Never Was, and no, he hadn’t been there either. Halloweentown, Wonderland, Neverland…they had all been empty for Riku, ironic considering how vast he had once thought all the worlds to be, but without Sora’s light, everything was dull now.

“How about The Land of Dragons?” Xion suggested, hopping up triumphantly with a handful of shells clutched in her fist.

“Why that one?” Riku frowned.

“According to Kairi, that’s a world where you really helped Sora, Donald and Goofy out.”

Her sapphire blue eyes cut imploringly through Riku and he looked away, hunching his shoulders. She grasped his hand, setting something small against his palm and closing his fingers around it.

“Every world out there is worth a shot, right?” she said with a smile.

Then she was off, darting past him and across the sand with renewed vigor. She made her way back to the Gummiship that now belonged to her, Roxas and Lea, courtesy of King Mickey, Chip and Dale, turning back toward him once she was halfway up the loading ramp.

“I’ll go get Roxas and we’ll check out Beast’s Castle! Don’t be a lazy bum, okay? That’s Sora’s job.”

With a final smile, she was off, leaving Riku alone again. But if he was being honest with himself, Riku knew that he had really been alone the whole time. His heart gave a lurch inside his chest, the sensation similar to being tickled. It made him think of Sora. 

‘Silly, you’re not alone! I’m here!’

The thought made him smile. Xion was right. As long as they could all still feel Sora, there was still hope. There would always be hope, or at least, that’s what Riku longed to believe.

He slowly uncurled his fingers and found a single blue thalassa shell resting in his hand. 

“The Land of Dragons, huh?”

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The world honestly seemed the same as Riku remembered. Darkness still lingered – balance needed to remain in the worlds, after all – but it wasn’t a threat anymore. Riku didn’t feel oppressed just by being there, like he had the last time.

“So…first things first. I need to find Mulan and Shang. They’re my best chance at finding Sora if he’s here.”

“Oh, and what am I, chopped liver?”

“Huh?”

A little darkness, Riku had been expecting and could handle. A tiny lizard crawling up his arm and sitting itself on his shoulder…not so much.

“What the –? Who are you?”

“Who am I? Who am I?! I am the guardian of lost souls –”

At Riku’s raised brow, the lizard deflated, seemingly used to being called out for his antics.

“I’m the great and powerful Mushu,” the creature mumbled, crossing his tiny arms petulantly. 

“Guardian of lost souls?” Riku questioned. 

Could this little thing really help him save Sora? Guardian of lost souls did sound pretty promising.

Mushu perked up at that, hopping off Riku and showing off his muscles or lack thereof, supposedly as a sign of strength or superiority.

“So you liked that part, huh? I wanted to get a little creative with my introduction, but Mulan says I shouldn’t go around saying it to just anyone because technically it’s not true.” He rolled his eyes at that part, but was quick to jump back in and defend his own honor. “I’m still a guardian of lost souls, just souls of the Fa family, not…all souls.”

Mushu deflated again at that, pride tarnished, and so did Riku.

"So you can’t help me?” he sighed.

“Hey, hey, hey, I never said that! I heard you talking about Sora being in trouble. And that boy is my man! If he’s in trouble, sign me up for the ride to save him!”

“Woah!”

Crawling up Riku again, Mushu settled himself more firmly on the boy’s shoulders, obviously meaning business about the whole ride thing.

“Oh, and I know what you’re thinking and I’m a dragon, not a lizard.”

"O…kay?”

Mushu gave his shoulder a pat and then pointed to somewhere far off in the distance.

“The palace and Mulan are that way! She’ll want to help Sora even more than me and that’s saying something.”

“Riku!”

Startled by hearing his named called out by a voice he recognized, Riku turned, surprised as all hell to find Kairi of all people running toward him, and with a bright smile no less.  
After she had come back with Sora only for Sora to fade away, she hadn’t wanted to see anyone, feeling too guilty and locking herself away. Riku hadn’t wanted to see anyone either really, at least not at first. It hadn’t even been his choice to let people in to see him, since he had locked himself away, too. But then one day Roxas had barged into his room and told him that enough was enough, they were all going to start looking for Sora and Riku had to help them otherwise he was a bad friend and Roxas was going to fuck his shit up for real.

It had been quite the eye opener for Riku, but he still hadn’t managed to work up the nerve to try talking to Kairi before up and starting his worlds’ tour search for Sora.  
And now here she was, reaching out to him.

She came to a stop in front of him, bending down to catch her breath. “Riku, I’m so glad I caught you!”

“What are you doing here?”

Not that he wasn’t happy to see her because he was. It managed to remind him a little bit of those times on the islands when they were kids and dreamed of other, bigger worlds out there, him, Sora and Kairi.

“I know how to find Sora!”

Riku’s brain flat lined for a second and he felt his breath catch once he was able to process Kairi’s words. 

“What?”

“It’s so obvious, I don’t know how none of us thought of it until now!”

Riku reached out, jostling Mushu, who scrambled off him with a yelp, and grabbed Kairi’s arms, making her stop her excited rambling and look at him.

“How, Kairi? How can we find Sora?”

“He used the power of waking to find me, right? The last heart he was connected to was mine.”

Riku understood what she was trying to say before she could finish and he felt his breath catch again, that strange but also comforting tickling sensation back to rile him up.  
“So you can dive into my heart and pull him out or use my heart to find out where he is so we can go get him! Even if there’s only a fragment left, it should be enough to bring the rest of him back, right?”

It was so simple. Kairi was right – how had none of them thought of it? And Riku wouldn’t be abusing his power like Sora had when he’d saved Kairi because he didn’t go using it time and time again, hadn’t used it since he’d dived in Sora’s heart to save him.

A part of him didn’t care what happened to him; he would give his life to save Sora. But he also knew that if he saved Sora only to disappear, Sora would just keep abusing his power to bring Riku back and then Sora would disappear again and it would just be a never ending circle, causing all three of them more unimaginable pain.

“That’s…that’s genius!” Riku laughed breathlessly.

“Um, excuse me! Hello? Down here!” 

“Oh, sorry Mushu. This is my friend, Kairi.”

Kairi blinked, startled at first, but then knelt down in front of the lizard –er, dragon – and held out one of her hands with a smile.

“Hello, Mushu. Do you know Sora? Is that who you were talking to Riku about?”

After giving her the stink eye for several, long seconds, Mushu jumped onto the redhead’s hand and slithered up to her shoulders, just as he’d done with Riku.

“As a matter of fact, yes. Sora’s the man, just like Mulan!” Mushu paused, frowning in thought. “Well, sort of.”

“Anyway…” Riku coughed, politely trying to guide the conversation back to saving Sora. “Kairi has an idea on how we can find Sora!”

Suffice to say, Mushu did not look impressed.

“Yeah, I got that, pretty boy. So you guys don’t need my help after all…?”

He motioned to the far off palace with hopeful eyes but Riku merely shook his head. 

“If Kairi’s plan doesn’t work, we’ll come find you and Mulan at the palace right away. Promise.”

Mushu sighed, sullenly stalking off as angrily as a miniature dragon could.

“Alright, have it your way then. Honestly, you try to be a hero and you just get rejected. Mulan and I will start a search party of our own and we’ll have something you two won’t. A lucky cricket!”

Kairi turned back toward Riku once Mushu was out of sight.

“So…how did you two meet?”

“I’d say it’s a long story but everything happened so fast I’m not sure I fully understand what just happened,” Riku chuckled.

“Oh, so do you need me to explain how we’re going to find Sora again?” the redhead teased.

“N-No!” Riku spluttered.

Kairi giggled and Riku followed suit a moment after. It felt nice, like the old days, only…there was an obvious gaping hole between them that screamed Sora’s name, begging to be filled. 

“Well…uh…” Riku started, scratching at his neck uncomfortably. “You’ll have to fall asleep, if I’m going to dive into your heart.”

"Oh.” Kairi, blinked, obviously having forgotten that little tidbit. “Right.”

Riku shuffled from foot to foot uncomfortably as the redhead looked for a decent sleep spot. She finally decided on a nearby rock overhang, small in size but would keep her from being seen or rained on, should the weather decide to take a turn.

“Um…”

Kairi shot Riku a pointed look as she sat down and started to make herself comfortable.

“Oh, right. Sorry!”

Riku whirled around to face the opposite direction and give the girl her privacy, his cheeks flaming red in embarrassment. He had no idea how he’d be able to tell when Kairi fell asleep but he’d make do somehow. 

Closing his eyes, Riku tuned out everything around him and honed his senses, focusing only on the sound of Kairi’s breathing. It took a little while for her breaths to even out and deepen, and even then, Riku waited a couple more minutes to make sure, before turning around and finding Kairi already in a heavy slumber. 

He took in the bags under his friend’s eyes, saw how she looked even skinnier than she had before, could see the tension still in her frame even in sleep…  
Sora’s disappearance had left an impact on all of them, not just mentally and emotionally but physically, too. Riku was sure that he had lost weight, muscle, hell, even brain cells due to how much time he had just wanted to sleep and try to shut out the pain of Sora’s absence even for just a couple of hours.

Turning all of his focus to diving, Riku once again tuned out everything else, focusing on Kairi and her heart’s light. It wasn’t the same as Sora’s and he felt his own heart ache at the thought.

No. He had to concentrate. Breathe deep, focus his energy and use it to create a tether of sorts between his heart and Kairi’s. Climbing that tether until he got to the other side and diving into the girl’s heart just like it was the waters back home.

“Submerge yourself in the other person’s presence until it encompasses you completely,” he remembered Yen Sid telling both Sora and himself during their training for the Mark of Mastery exam.

A deep breath and then a rush of feelings that weren’t his own but mirrored his, calling out for Sora, pleading for him to come back or to at least answer her pleas, rushing over him like the chill of cold water and threatening to drown him if his conviction ever wavered.

At first there was only darkness surrounding him, but then, it had been like that, when he’d first dived into Sora’s heart. It didn’t take long for the darkness to fade away and reveal Destiny Islands, bright and beautiful as ever. Then Kairi herself, or rather a figment of her cast by her heart, standing there on the sand, barefoot, her shoes and Destiny’s Embrace lying there lazily in front of the glittering water.  
“Riku,” the figment said.

She seemed sad, almost…resigned. Riku’s eyes narrowed. 

“I knew you would come. But…” Her gaze shifted to afternoon sun glowing off in the horizon. “You won’t find Sora here,” she said, shaking her head. “You won’t find him anywhere.”

Ice water flooded Riku’s veins, but he had to stay calm, he had to. He’d only just dived into Kairi’s heart, after all. There was no way that Sora wasn’t just somewhere further in, deeper in the redhead’s heart.

She shook her head again, blue eyes gazing at him empathetically, tears already darkening her lashes and clogging her throat. 

“He’s not here. You, Kairi and everyone else…you’re all just lying to yourselves. Wanting to believe what you long to be true. If this was the other way around and Kairi were to dive into your heart, it would be telling her the same thing I’m telling you now.”

No. No…that couldn’t be true. It couldn’t be. Sora wasn’t gone. He just wasn’t. Riku would feel it. He would feel it.

The figment shook her head sadly. “I’m sorry.”

Then it walked toward Destiny’s Embrace, picking the keyblade up and getting into a battle ready position without hesitation.

“If you need me to fight you in order for your heart to see the truth, then so be it. Kairi’s heart knows deep down that Sora’s gone, that he’s not coming back. He gave up all of himself so he could save her and she knows that. She just doesn’t want to believe it.”

“…You’re wrong.”

Continuing to stare Riku down, the figment didn’t even flinch, her keyblade still at the ready.

“You’re wrong!” Riku shouted, this time louder, this time stronger. “Sora wouldn’t just leave us. He’s so much stronger than that!”

“I’m sorry,” she said again, conviction the same as Riku’s – never wavering; a nightlight in the dark.

She came at Riku after that, done playing around and with no warning. Riku barely managed to dodge her first hit, summoning Braveheart an instant after and using its hilt to defend against the figment’s next blow.

This was the strongest Riku had ever seen Kairi, could ever remember her being. This was the true strength that slumbered in the deepest depths of her heart.  
‘So why would it lie to you?’ his own heart whispered.

Riku gritted his teeth together, denial and anger and hurt all fighting for dominance inside of him, demanding a release, demanding to be felt.  
“Shut up!” he yelled, surging forward and striking lightning fast.

But Kairi’s heart still managed to deflect the blow, pushing Riku back and flat on his back. Before he could push himself back up, Destiny’s Embrace was at his throat, keeping him pinned down as the figment stared at him with dangerously deadly eyes.

“Open your heart and let the truth in, Riku. It will only hurt that much more if you continue to deny it and you keep lying to yourself only to realize that all that hope was futile after all. He’s gone. He’s not in another world, he’s not here in Kairi’s heart, he’s not in yours or Roxas’s…He’s gone.”

Riku’s heart jumped up and slammed against his chest, a single beat, but that was enough, before the overwhelming pain and anguish began to tear at him like he was fighting Cerberus in the coliseum, only worse. Much, much worse. 

His eyes burned, his throat housing a silent scream that wouldn’t come out even if Riku opened his mouth and allowed it an exit. His clenched fists shook at his side, covered in bruises and sand. The calluses on his hand, from being a keyblade wielder, only served to remind him, there was another hand that was just as callused, that fit perfectly inside of his, that had once wielded their keyblades combined together alongside him. That had helped him stand again.

A heart that had helped him live again. And it was gone. Never again to beat in tandem with his as they stargazed on the islands, hand in hand, laying against the sand.  
The pain was unimaginable. Riku felt like how he could only assume Destiny Islands had felt as the darkness had swallowed it up, consuming it, whole.

“No….”

Echoes of that single word, of Kairi’s heart saying, ‘He’s gone’, of his heartbeat beating a black and blue tattoo against his chest, painful as holly, savage as a serpent. Seemingly eating his heart until Riku was sure there would be nothing left.

Destiny Islands faded away, leaving Riku swimming in darkness for several moments before he dove back up, gasping for air as he reemerged into The Land of Dragons and plummeted to the ground.

If Riku had thought the ache in his heart couldn’t get any worse than it had been while inside Kairi’s, he was horribly wrong. It was suffocating, madness at its worst, at its most destructive. 

“Sora…Sora, please no, please come back…”

He was hyperventilating, his brain telling him to just breathe but his throat constricting tighter and pitting the two forces against one another. He just…he couldn’t believe it. But his heart was empty now. Whereas before, he could still feel Sora, now all he felt was an empty shell still somehow beating in an equally hollow ribcage. This whole time, this whole time…his heart had been lying to him, trying to protect him from the truth, when deep down, just like Kairi, he had known. He just hadn’t wanted to believe it.

There was a part of him still in denial, too afraid of what would happen if it were really true, telling him, urging him to go to Twilight Town and see Roxas. Out of all the hearts connected to Sora’s, he had always felt Sora in Roxas the most.

Always able to see an outline of Sora’s light, following Roxas around, always showing that they were connected and had the strongest connection out of all of them. If he saw Roxas and that light was gone…then Sora really was…

Riku swallowed hard, bowing his head.

A hand on his arm and then a soft, sleepy voice saying, “Riku. Did you find him? Is he okay?”

Turning to meet the redhead’s gaze, another part of Riku broke when he saw Kairi’s innocently eager, earnest eyes pleading with him. But he couldn’t lie to her. Their hearts had already lied to them enough. And yet the minute he could get away from her, from Kairi, Riku knew where he would go, knew the boy who he would see, for proof that he already had, proof that would only cause his heart to shatter all over again.

Riku wanted to blame Kairi, he really, selfishly did. If Sora hadn’t felt like he needed to go after her, then he would still be here, he would still…But he knew deep down that it wasn’t Kairi’s fault. That was just who Sora was. And Kairi already felt guilty enough as it was. 

Part of Riku still blamed himself, too. He had urged Sora to go, believed in him, because he had believed in him and knew Sora would go anyway, no matter how worried Riku also was. No matter how secretly terrified. Sora would not be stopped, no matter the consequences. But where Riku’s guilt was concerned…he could have gone with him. Fought alongside him, protected him, and he hadn’t.

…He hadn’t. 

The truth would shatter Kairi, just as it had Riku, but he had to tell her because who else would?

“Kairi, he’s…he’s not coming back.”

Her hand fell from his arm, as if in slow motion.

“What?”

“He’s gone.”

“No…No! Riku, that’s…what are you…no!”

Gritting his teeth, Riku grabbed Kairi by the arms and pulled them both up to a standing position.

“My heart can’t feel him anymore, Kairi. And if you open yours up, you won’t…you won’t feel him anymore either.”

Tears spilled from crystalline eyes down her cheeks and onto Riku’s hands, splashing onto her arms, a rippling tidal wave of emotion.

“No…It’s all my fault…This is all my fault…Riku, I’m sorry, I…I…”

Riku had no idea of the kind of strength needed for this, but he knew that he didn’t have it. And so like the coward he knew deep down he still was – a coward without Sora by his side – he turned and he ran.

“Riku, I’m sorry!”

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Twilight Town was exactly like The Land of Dragons had been: the same as Riku remembered it last being. He wasn’t sure if that was a good or a bad thing.

Now all he had to do was find Roxas and prove his heart wrong, even though he knew that his heart was finally telling him the truth, that what Kairi’s heart had told him was true. Why he wanted to cause himself even more pain was beyond him. He just…wanted to be sure. Before he gave up completely on his best and truest friend, he had to be absolutely positive there was no hope left; and what a crushing blow that would be, like hearing what Kairi’s heart had to say only a thousand times worth.

“Stay on track, Riku. Roxas,” the silver haired boy muttered to himself.

Riku didn’t need to go far before the boy appeared, as if being summoned merely by his name being spoken. He was flanked by Xion, Lea and even Isa. Since Roxas and Xion were both here, it looked like the duo had finished their search for Sora in Beast’s Castle. Riku’s heart ached, expanding outside of his chest and down his arms, making him numb.

“Riku! Roxas, come and say hi,” Xion said excitedly.

“No way! I’m not saying hi to that jerk.” Roxas responded with his usual frown, the one he always sent Riku’s way alongside a stoic glare, complete with pinched brows and stormy eyes.

Lea leaned down, one arm against Roxas’s shoulder, grinning a sly smile. “And yet you say hi to Isa every morning,” he cackled.

Roxas flushed scarlet in complete embarrassment. “S-Shut up!”

Isa surprisingly chuckled, the chiming bells of Xion’s laughter joining along. But utter dread had pooled in Riku’s gut, sinking like a stone weighed down even further by an anchor chained to it. He had been splashed with the iciest of water and there was no way to ever warm up. No way to ever resurface. 

There right in front of him was the final piece of proof Riku had needed. The light that followed Roxas around, a physical manifestation of his connection with Sora…it was gone. Severed. 

Suddenly it was hard to breathe and the world forever bathed in twilight swam in his vision sickeningly, a dangerous blur of fire. His knees felt weak, like he would fall to them and break them on the brick ground any minute now.

“What the fuck are you staring at?” Roxas sneered. “Do I have something on my face?”

Only a moment after, Roxas understood the look in Riku’s eyes, putting his childish tirade on pause as his own eyes slowly widened in understanding horror.

“No…”

“Roxas! What’s wrong? Riku, what’s going on?” 

Xion was suddenly frantic, blue eyes darting between the two of them worriedly. Even Isa and Lea had quieted, recognizing the somber mood now accompanying the twilight. The end of days. 

Riku tried to swallow, tried to find his voice, so he could at least say that he had to go, that he couldn’t stand looking at them anymore – especially Roxas and Xion since they had come from Sora and it showed in their eyes – but he couldn’t choke out anything except a pained gasp.

Roxas, still staring at Riku in silent horror, did nothing to stop the silver haired boy from going, so Riku took that as his cue to keep running, run faster, like the coward he was – coward, coward, coward! – back to the Gummiship.

He didn’t know what to do, what was real and what wasn’t…he didn’t know where to go. He thought of home but it was no longer home without Sora there to come back to, to reunite with, to grab in a tight bear hug as Riku buried his nose in sun kissed, saltwater scented spikes. He was gone. Gone.

But there was nowhere else to go, at least not in Riku’s mind. Destiny Islands was where everything started and it was where it all had ended. Full circle.  
The play island was the same as ever, and wasn’t that just amazing? Everything was the same as ever, except it wasn’t because Sora wasn’t there. But Riku paid his surroundings no mind as he trod quietly on the sand, the waves coming up to bathe boots in a gentle caress.

Riku closed his eyes.

Kairi was there, and Sora, too, sitting on the papou tree same as always, but then a lone tear slipped down Kairi’s cheek and Sora was fading away into the sunset.

Opening his eyes once more, Riku found himself surrounded by the darkness of night, the twinkling stars only serving to remind him of fonder times, when he and Sora were little and only dreamt of other worlds.

This time a lone tear slid down Riku’s cheek.

He gritted his teeth, clenched his fists – the pain was too great. 

“Sora, say something!”

It was like yelling into a void of nothingness, because his heart knew the truth now. There would be no answer, and still Riku pleaded.

“Please! Let me know that you’re out there somewhere. Give me a sign that you’re okay! Anything…”

Nothing. The only sound being the waves crashing against the shore, only to fall back and leave the sand bare like the water had never been there in the first place. Riku could just barely – or maybe it was his imagination – make out the impression of footprints, right beside him in the sand. Then the tide came back in and washed them away, too.  
His heart ached, but his body felt numb. Everything was heavy, taking a huge effort to even do something as small as blinking.

Riku smiled bitterly.

“Why did you have to pick somewhere to go that I couldn’t follow?”

He closed his eyes and for once the darkness that followed wasn’t just inviting, it was soothing. Numbing him even further. He didn’t want to feel anymore. He just wanted to sleep the pain away forever. So he curled in on himself, hugging his arms to his bleeding chest, a gaping hole wanting nothing more than to be filled – Sora, Sora, SORA – and finally, he felt his knees give out underneath him, collapsing.

The water came back, tickling his hair and face and Riku could just barely pretend that it was his head in Sora’s lap, the brunet caressing his silver spikes and petting his face, telling him it was alright. They were okay.

Except they weren’t.

Something, anything…was better than this.


End file.
